Friday, June 25, 2010

Happy Weekend!

I had the day off today and it has been absolutely gorgeous outside. Mid 80's, sunny and just beautiful. It was very hot and humid yesterday but last night we had some pretty loud and heavy thunderstorms and that just pushed all the humid air right out of here.

This morning I went to the closing of my house. It is nice to finally have that albatros, so to speak, out of the way. The property was purchased by a developer who has plans to build a new home there. He got himself a good deal, and although I didn't get what I wanted, I did pretty well considering the economy is as it is and my house was on the market for 9 months. So after the closing, I headed to the bank and deposited the check. The good thing is most of it is free and clear since my house was paid off and didn't carry a mortgage.
It's nice to have a little nest egg now. I am planning to pay off a few bills and help Eric a little with the wedding. I'll be sure to put some away for when Sara gets married someday.

Eric's wedding is just 2 months away and things have calmed down some. Eric did speak with his father about the whole rehearsal dinner thing and apparently the whole spouses not invited to the dinner was because my Ex was making all kinds of demands. After thinking about it, Eric decided that he needed to get a handle on things and suggested to his father that he had better start getting used to George being in the picture since we are all family now in one way or another. Dave initially said that he wouldn't pay his half of the rehearsal dinner if George was there but has since changed his mind. He does realize that making demands on Eric and Jessie means he may sabatage his relationship with them. So for now, everything is well and he has promised to behave himself. Time will tell. I just hope everything remains stress free.

I have been searching online bridal shops for a dress and have narrowed it down to a few. I plan to go and try them on next weekend and hopefully I will get lucky and be able to purchase one. Will post a picture of it when the decision has been made.

This weekend we have a birthday party on Sunday. This is a quiet weekend compared to last weekend. We had to make an emergency trip to Ottawa to attend a funeral and left last Friday right after work. It was a long 7 hour drive but we made it and stayed overnight Friday just outside of Montreal. We continued our trip Saturday morning to get the the convent (George's aunt, who passed was a nun), and then started home shortly after the service. We ended up driving the entire way home Saturday night and got home just before midnight. It made for a long day but it was so much better sleeping in our own bed Saturday night and being able to spend Sunday at home.

Just a few days of work next week and I will have 12 days off. Can't wait! Hopefully George can get a few days off too but I doubt it. Maybe he will only get the actual holidays off but we will make the best of it.

Gotta go. I should be in the kitchen making supper.

Have a great weekend!!!

Sunday, June 13, 2010

I Need Advice!!

I need to pose a question to you and please don't answer in my favor just because I am your friend. I truly don't know if I am being unreasonable here.

As you know, my son is getting married in August. Last night I was presented with the rehearsal dinner plans made by my son and his fiancee and am less than thrilled about the outcome.

I've been divorced from my first husband for 10 years and our separation and divorce was my idea, not his. My ex has had a very difficult time accepting our divorce, suffers from depression and alcoholism, and we've had a very rocky road over the years. When he was told of my marriage to George he was very negative and did his best to sway my kids against him. Dave is very insecure and I believe he still had thoughts that we would someday reconcile. Anyway...the kids usually tiptoe around things so they don't upset him or avoid him altogether.

So...the plans for the rehearsal dinner include the rehearsal and a small gathering afterwards in a small function hall. I was told that only the bridal party and parents of the bride and groom are invited to attend. This excludes spouses and significant others of the members of the bridal party. Initially I was told that it is a space issue that no other people can be included. However, I am convinced that all may be because my ex will be uncomfortable in George's presence and Eric and Jessie are trying to be sensitive to Dave's feelings. I can understand that to a point...however...I am footing the bill for half of this dinner and I think my new husband, should be included. I don't mind telling you that my feelings are extremely hurt that George is not included, and I think my ex needs to suck it up and be an adult about this. Then again, it has been pointed out to me that no one's spouses are invited and there are several other people who aren't happy about this arrangement so I am not alone. When I asked Eric why can't we have the dinner elsewhere, if it is a space issue, he said that the reservation has been made and this is the way it is. Plus...if we invite more people, this will result in a larger bill and that is something my ex (who supposedly will pay the other half) cannot afford.

I am doubtful that Dave will even go to the rehearsal dinner for a couple of reasons. 1...he doesn't drive or have a car and it is at least a 30 minute drive to the rehearsal hall. 2...he doesn't have any money. 3...he's been known to bail out at the last minute. I being unreasonable to want my husband with me at this event? It is supposed to be a very happy time in all of our lives and am I ruining the excitement and happiness by having hurt feelings? Are my feelings less important than my ex husbands because I am stronger and can deal with the outcome better than he can? Basicly, my son told me that this is his and Jessie's day and they just want everything to go perfectly, which I can completely understand, and he told me that if it meant having his Dad there or George there, he would rather have his Dad. Ouch...that kind of hurt since his father has not exactly been the ideal father, but I can understand the importance. I also know that he is a little nervous of Dave drinking too much and making a fool out of himself but is that my fault??

I don't want to be known as the mother / mother in law from hell. I did have a long talk with Eric last night and told him exactly how I feel. He listened and said nothing is completely set in stone, meaning he does know there is a possibility that his father will not go anyway, but the plans are as they are and that seems to be that for now. He also pointed out that when there is a divorce involved...these kinds of things happen. True. Let me just say that last year when George's son got married, I was included in a lot of things but several things occurred on the day of the wedding which really hurt George's feelings and my kids were both there and saw how insensitivly certain things were handled. I asked Eric that very day to be mindful of those issues when his time came so we can avoid those hurt feelings.
He assured me that on the day of the wedding...those things will not happen. But this is 'only the rehearsal dinner.' Apparently to him, it is not that important. I guess I shouldn't be so upset?? I don't know.

What do you all think???
Thoughts on this no matter what you feel or think are welcome. Any ideas also, to make this an easier transition are greatly welcomed.

Saturday, June 05, 2010

My Front Yard

We had a very busy day today. We went to Cabela's in Scarborough Maine with George's son Jon and Jon's wife Nikki. George has been wanting to go for awhile now and Jon was looking for some ideas for George's birthday and Father's Day gift so we thought it would be fun to all go together and let George pick out whatever he wanted. We spent over 2 hours walking around the store and George got himself some hunting gear that he was in dire need of. I also bought him a lined fall jacket since he needed one of those too. What a great store and when Nikki sends me the pics she took today, I will post them.

We went to Famous Dave's restaurant for lunch after working up quite an appetite. The food there is quite good and I enjoyed my lunch very much. I got a combo plate with chicken and beef brisket (all BBQ) and it came with corn bread and I picked Dave's Mac and cheese to go with it. Very yummy with a little kick of jalapenos mixed in.

We just got home a bit ago so it has been a rather long day. I have a load of laundry going but that's all I am doing. The rest of the evening will be spent relaxing. But first, some pics of my front yard.

George has been working very hard this spring to get the yard in shape. He got his tractor all fixed up and now he can use it to mow the front and back yard and he has this nifty little utility trailer to pull all of his yard tools and buckets, etc. around. Sure does make life easier for him since we have a lot of space to mow, weed and take care of. So I have enclosed some pics of what our front yard now looks like, after several hours of weeding, mowing and planting.

This is to the left of the front door. I have no idea what the light colored bushes are called but there is a peony bush behind those and last year we only had about 6 flowers blossom from it. This year we counted 47 flowers just about ready to blossom.

This area is to the right of the front stairs. This little bear cub was used as a door stopper awhile back and then was just sitting in the corner of the kitchen collecting dust so I thought he would enjoy being outdoors and decorating (guarding) the flower bed. I loved the galvanized buckets George had on the side of the house. Before they just had weeds in them. Now they are filled with pretty flowers.

I found this bird bath at a tractor supply store, of all places. It was the last one they had and I got it at a real bargain. Off to the side you can see a large oepn space. That is where George does most of his bow target practicing.

A view of the front of the house

More shots

Before the peonies started to bloom

Yesterday one opened up

We had rain overnight and 2 of the peonies that are open were full of water and were hanging pretty low to the ground. I think tomorrow, I am going to see if I can tie them up somehow so they stay all bunched up and not laying all over the ground.